Dirty Socks or Mince Pies
by novemberthird
Summary: Based on the prompt: "I ran into my ex at the supermarket, and you saw my distress and pretended we were dating, so thanks." Muggle!AU. Lily runs into an ex-boyfriend at the supermarket, and who else is there to save her besides James Potter.


**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters with the exception of Adam Mumps.**

 **I'd also like to thank jamespottes on tumblr for beta reading this!**

–

Lily was internally cursing her sister for making her go to the supermarket on Christmas Eve. It wasn't Lily's fault that Vernon had eaten the remainder of the mince pies before they had even sat down for dinner. Really, _Vermin_ and Petunia should have been the ones to drive for an hour to find an open supermarket at this time of the afternoon.

She hadn't even been in the supermarket for five minutes when she felt a tap on her shoulder. She turned around to see a pair of striking blue eyes looking into hers.

'Lily Evans,' the brown-haired boy said. 'It's been too long.'

As Lily looked at the boy in front of her, she wished she could be anywhere but there.

'Adam Mumps,' she replied, fidgeting as he made to hug her.

'How are you? I haven't seen you in three years.' Adam kept her uncomfortably close to him. She was more than half-tempted to hit him where it hurt but decided to at least act civilised.

'I wonder why,' she muttered under her breath. She really didn't have the time for guys like Adam Mumps, who thought that they were every girl's dream, a present from God Himself. 'How is Anna?' He flinched at the reminder of their nasty breakup.

'Don't you think that should stay in the past, Lily?' His hands were too close to her and had Lily's eyes shifting uncomfortably to look at strangers. She met the eyes of a hazel-eyed man around her age, who gave her a sympathetic look before putting down his basket and coming towards them.

Adam's pulled away from her slightly as he heard the man approach him from behind. Lily's eyes took in the newcomer. He had untidy black hair and was fairly tall. She saw the slight smirk he threw her, and her heart fluttered. She felt like she recognized him from somewhere, but she couldn't place him.

'I'm sorry, love.' His voice held a certain charisma to it. 'I couldn't find that chocolate you wanted, but I'm sure Padfoot has some lying around.' She didn't bother asking him who or what a Padfoot was as he took her hand in his. The hazel-eyed man let his eyes wander to Adam, 'Who is this?' He glared at Adam's hand that was still holding Lily closer than the average acquaintance would. Adam let go as James made to kiss the place above her ear. 'Play along,' he whispered, a soft sigh that sent a shiver down her spine.

'This is Adam Mumps, we used to date.' Lily leant back into him. He was surprisingly warm.

Adam looked at the other man in shock.

'Hello, Mumps.' The man outstretched his hand towards him, 'I'm James Potter, her boyfriend.'

'You're dating James Potter.' Adam turned towards Lily, ignoring James who was only half-heartedly trying to conceal a smirk. The name rang a bell, but Lily couldn't recall where from.

'Yes, is there a problem with that?' She could feel James' eyes on her–if he hadn't had her swooning already, his name would have done it. She had always found the name to be quite attractive.

'You hated football players when we were together, said they were pompous prats who just wasted their parents' money.' He scoffed as he looked at James, 'And now you're dating Puddlemere United's team captain.' The recognition finally made sense to Lily. Her father idolised the team, yet Lily couldn't even recognise their captain.

'To be fair, Mumps, I am quite fit in my uniform.' James winked at Lily, and she let out a genuine laugh.

'And he is a pompous prat,' Lily boldly kissed his cheek, prolonging what should have been a swift gesture. She couldn't help the urge that had overcome her; he was quite handsome and unlike the usual boys Lily tended to attract. She smiled as she saw a slight blush appear on his cheeks. 'He's rather gorgeous though, isn't he? And he's very good with his hands,' she paused for a moment and continued with a sly smile, 'amongst other body parts.'

She saw Adam's eyes narrow at James as the other boy's eyes widened in shock, 'I think we better get going, love,' James said, when he composed himself, gazing at her with a certain fondness. 'Mother will be quite worried if we're late.' He looked back at Adam, 'I would say it was nice meeting you, but I'd rather not do it again.'

Lily stifled her laughter at her _boyfriend's_ comment. She addressed Adam, 'Well, we're off. Have fun with Anna again.' James dragged her away from the slightly red-faced berk whilst attempting to conceal his laughter.

He stopped at the place he had initially spotted her from, picking up his basket, his hand still holding hers. 'So, good with my hands, am I?' She glared at him playfully, 'Don't forget pompous prat.'

'Hmm… I suppose that's a new one.' There was a pause where neither one knew what to say. 'Why'd you breakup?'

She looked up at him and saw a mixture of curiosity and something else she couldn't place in his eyes. She felt an unexplainable connection to him. 'To put it briefly, I wouldn't sleep with him, and he couldn't keep a certain piece of his anatomy to himself.'

James' eyes softened, his voice coming out soothingly. 'He's a jerk. Not much was lost with him, was there?'

'No, there wasn't.'

Lily let her eyes check him out, lingering a second too long on his lips, 'I also couldn't be dating a popular football player if I were with him, could I?'

His laugh was cute. 'I'm sorry, you looked like you were in distress. Plus, my mother taught me to help anyone in need,' he bit his lip, his cheeks reddening. 'Especially, if they're a beautiful woman.'

It was her turn to blush–she cursed her pale skin for that. 'Thank you,' she said. 'You're not too bad yourself.'

He let go of her hand, using it to ruffle his already messy hair instead. 'How would you like to go out to dinner with me?'

Lily grinned. 'I supposed it's the least I could do after you decided to rescue me. It would be rude otherwise.'

'Completely rude,' he agreed as he smiled down at her.

She took his hand in hers again, steering him towards the pastries. 'I will need an autograph, though. My dad would be highly disappointed if I met you and didn't even think to get him one.'

James laughed. 'What would you like me to sign?' His tone was rather suggestive.

'Would the pastry be too weird?' she teased.

'I've signed people's chests, a dog bone, and even someone's dirty socks before.'

Lily raised an eyebrow at him, 'Why would someone make you sign a pair of dirty socks?'

'My best mate, Padfoot, wanted to see how much he could get for them. They sold for three thousand pounds.'

Lily threw back her head back in laughter. 'I'll have to considering getting a pair myself.'

'It's almost Christmas–I supposed they could serve as a belated present. Nothing says romance like a pair of dirty Christmas socks.'

She squeezed his hand briefly. 'I supposed I could just have you sign a photo like a normal person, but where's the fun in that?'

–

They spent another fifteen minutes walking around the supermarket, fingers linked together the entire time. James' presence soothing her in a way no one else ever had.

'When will I see you again?' he asked as he walked her to her car.

She deliberated her response for a moment, teasing him. 'Hmm… I supposed we do have to actually arrange the date, don't we?'

'Of course.' His fingers played with hers as Lily leant back against her car.

'You'll probably need my number to do so as well, right?'

She noticed his blush return as he let go of her hand. His hands fumbling in his pockets for his phone as she withdrew hers from her purse.

'Err… here,' he handed the contraption to her, his blush not having yet subsided. She handed him her phone, and eyed him as he ruffled his hair–did he really have a right to be so attractive?

They exchanged phones once more. 'I'll see you soon, Lily Evans,' he said as he read the name on the phone.

'And I'll see you, _Mr Sexy in Uniform_.'

She let out a slight snort.

James seemed to hesitate for a moment before he came closer and placed a kiss on her cheek. 'Have a Happy Christmas, Lily.' With that he walked off. His cheeks were red but not from the cold.

She quickly got into the driver's side, sighing as she rested her body against the seat.

Lily couldn't help but grin, stupid football players who made her heart swoon.

–

 **AN: Hope you enjoyed the first of my twelve Pottermas oneshots!**


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